I talk a lot about women over 35 travelling solo or becoming digital nomads and living life (and working) on their own terms. But sooner or later, women hit perimenopause and the changes we experience can make travelling trickier to navigate. Gents, don’t stop reading: you all have women in your life – wives, girlfriends, mothers, sisters – who will experience perimenopause, and knowing how it affects us will make it easier for you to understand and support us.
I’m not a medical professional. I’m a woman in her early 50s who has been waking up not feeling herself most days for a while now. See, perimenopause can start in your late 30s and go well into your 60s. And while there are many symptoms that a lot of women experience (hot flushes, night sweats, anxiety, low libido and weight gain), each woman’s perimenopause journey is different.
So how can you still travel without letting perimenopause symptoms get in your way of enjoying the journey? You can still do it, but it takes a little bit of planning and a lot of flexibility so you can go with the flow of how you feel each day.
Before leaving home
First things first: see your doctor to make sure nothing else is going on. And if you’re suffering particularly badly, there may be prescription medications that can help. A doctor may dismiss you as going through a “natural life phase”, in which case, find another doctor!
The next thing to do is to get into some good habits. Eat and sleep well, exercise regularly and make sure you listen to your body. Keeping a journal may help to join the dots between what you’re doing and how you’re feeling.
For example, I found that once I started lifting weights and running or practising yoga regularly, the night sweats all but disappeared. Eating well and consistently (lots of veggies and protein) reduced my irritability. Combining the two with enough and consistent sleep generally makes me feel more like my old self. I still get brain fog some days, but it’s more infrequent. I have zero science to prove these links, only what I found worked for me. So experimenting with different things and tracking what works (or doesn’t) can be helpful.
Cutting down on alcohol also made a difference. I was never a big drinker, but for a while I cut it out completely. It just messed up my sleep too much. After a while, I reintroduced one drink on nights out with friends or after work while travelling. No big drinking nights, never on an empty stomach and not just before bed.
These are all habits and routines to get into that help keep you on a good track. They also help for those days when you can’t stick to a routine; as long as you pick the habits back up as soon as possible.
While on the road: travelling during perimenopause
With those good habits set up, the next step is to take them on the road with you. This will likely mean adjusting how you travel. For me, that means fewer hostel nights and more time in an Airbnb so that I can batch cook for myself and eat well. I also combine Airbnb time with working.
My hostel time is now exclusively downtime – either reading for pleasure, exploring a city or joining a tour. It also gives me my much-needed people time. Where a hostel has a kitchen, I take advantage of it, even if it’s to cook breakfast and get a good (still slow) start to the day. My Airbnb (or hotel) time is now all about working, exercising and eating well. It helps me to work too when I’m not distracted by other interesting travellers to hang out with and swap travel tales.
I also used to enjoy moving frequently while in a new country. Now I take it slower and spend longer in each place. Travel days are tiring at the best of times and usually mean not eating well either. Moving less often gives me a chance to rest, exercise a little and have regular meals.
Learning to listen to your body
Half the problem with perimenopause is that things keep changing. As hormone levels change, so do your symptoms and your good and not-so-good days. That journalling comes in handy for tracking changes, anything new or different, and identifying strategies for dealing with those changes.
There are times, for example, when you can push through a slow start or morning stiffness. Perhaps by moving gently or taking it easier to get going with your day. Sometimes that will work; other days, you find you just need to go back to bed and take a nap. If you can’t deal with heat as much anymore (like me), adjusting your day to stay indoors and work (or visit a museum) during the hottest part of the day may help. This is where that flexibility comes in handy. When it comes to work deadlines or a forthcoming tour, you may have to push through no matter how you’re feeling. So it’s worth taking it easier on yourself when you can.
Finding your balance
It may take a bit of trial and error to find what works for you. There’s a fine line between allowing perimenopause symptoms to be an excuse for not doing anything and pushing yourself too hard. If you’re a traveller or nomad, chances are you’re a self-starter. Perhaps even an overachiever. (Yep, it takes one to know one!) But where your line is will be different to mine. Which brings us back to knowing yourself and listening to what your body is telling you. You may need to adjust what or how you do things, but it doesn’t have to mean giving them up altogether.
When I wrote the Highs and Lows of Backpacking in Your 40s blog post, I hadn’t realised that the insecurity and anxiety I was feeling was down to perimenopausal changes. And while I wouldn’t change a word of that post, I now cut myself some slack. I’ve embraced the early morning starts and enjoy the peace and quiet. I’m more comfortable with more time alone, and I may take more rideshares and fewer metro rides than I used to.
But if my hormones thought they could ground me at home, they have another thing coming. I’m off to climb the 329 steps to the hilltop bar for a sundowner. I’ve slept, eaten well and got some work done. Now it’s time for exercise and relaxation. Travelling during perimenopause may be a little different but I’m still doing it.